Figuring out how to stay in the present moment is challenging enough for most people. And it’s made even harder if their present moment sucks…… I mean, really, why would any of us want to remain focused on stuff that sucks?
I’ll tell you why….. Because it’s only by being present and dealing with the crap in front of you that you can actually change it into something better….
– You can’t change anything happening now when you are thinking about the past. It’s gone, over and done with. However, you can learn from it, from your mistakes and your successes. Learn everything you can to make your future better.
– You also cannot change your present when you are off thinking of the future. And as much as I am a fan of actively creating better futures for ourselves through visualizations, there is an appropriate time and place for everything.
And maybe this is the time for you to learn how to make this moment better…. better so that you get excited about it and enjoy living it!
So the question is….
How do you live in the moment when the moment sucks?
This moment sucks and I don’t want to be here! Isn’t this just part of life for all of us at some time or another? Our minds want to be somewhere else, either in the past or the future. However, you cannot make the present situation better by escaping it. Practicing being present will allow you to remain HERE, NOW, and with your presence, you can make the positive changes you desire.
What Does It Mean To ‘Live In The Moment?’
The present moment is the only time we have. Our lives are made up of a series of ‘present moments’…. And it is in these moments that we experience our thoughts, feelings, and emotions.….
When all the moments are added together, it seems that our life is moving forward. However….
– Even if we are remembering the past or thinking of the future, we are doing it NOW.
– Our bodies can only ever be in THIS moment….
– And we experience feelings and emotions NOW, not in the past or future.
So really, it’s impossible to be anywhere else, physically and emotionally. However, our minds, while thinking in the present moment, may often dwell on stuff from our past or have thoughts about the future.
“I have realized that the past and future are real illusions that they exist in the present, which is what there is and all there is.” – Alan Watts
Being aware of what is happening now is being mindful. If we are eating, we are aware of the texture, taste, and smell of the food. If we are walking, we notice how our foot connects with the ground, how the pressures move through our body, how our breath is flowing in and out of our lungs, etc…..
Living in the moment helps strengthen self-awareness. This means that we become more aware of our physical, mental, and emotional health in ways that we cannot when our thoughts are away somewhere else.
Self-awareness keeps us grounded and is key to maintaining (and improving) our overall health and our whole life experience. How?
Noticing if we are stressed, anxious, or depressed is the necessary first step to changing the situation. And these feelings can be changed…. but only if we CONSCIOUSLY CHOOSE to alter the way we are thinking and/or alter what we are doing IN THIS MOMENT.
So, How Do We Live In The Moment when The Moment Sucks?
This moment sucks, and we would rather be somewhere else… What can we do to make this moment better?
We are suffering because what we are experiencing is different from what we want to be experiencing…. In effect, we are resisting ‘WHAT IS.’
Ok… so the sensible thing to do is to stop resisting what is! Simple right? Yeah, right!
It’s impossible if your thoughts are wandering off somewhere else. However, it is simple if you’re present.
“Mindfulness isn’t difficult, we just need to remember to do it.” – Sharon Salzberg
So, we need to become aware of our thoughts and feelings at this moment. And the easiest way to do that is to focus your attention on your breathing.
Are you breathing through your nose or mouth? Is your breath deep and relaxed or it is shallow, up in the top of the chest, and stressed? Is the in-breath and out-breath of equal duration or is one longer than the other…..
Focusing on your breath is just one way, (I believe the best and easiest way), to bring our senses into the present moment.
You could just as easily step into the garden and become aware of all the sights, sounds, and smells that are currently available for you to experience. Or, put some music on, close your eyes, and become aware of each note being played and the effects that it has on your thoughts and feelings.
However, these are just some ways to train ourselves to become more present more often. And once we can do this, we can turn our attention to making this moment better… making our lives into a journey filled with moments that we are satisfied with……. (the absence of sucky moments.)
If Many of Your Moments Suck, Don’t Settle for it!
Living with stress, disappointment, anxiety, fear, doubt, etc. every day is negatively impacting your ability to be healthy…. And you cannot suffer these emotions and be happy at the same time.
So, what are you prepared to do to make your life better? Because you do realize that you are the only one that has the power to think inside your head. And you do realize that it is you who is thinking that your life sucks at this moment, right?
Also, it is you who has chosen, by not making different choices, to put up with this suckiness for how long now????? I suggest that for however long it’s been, it has been too long… and it is time for a positive change!
And this means that it’s time you stop living with a mindset that your life sucks. Because, after all, it is your thoughts that are telling you that your life sucks, nothing else…. Other people are busy living fun-filled, happy, adventurous lives at this very moment…..
Why them, and not you?
…… Maybe they are just better at looking for the good things that constantly surround us all.
“What we are today comes from our thoughts of yesterday, and our present thoughts build our life of tomorrow: Our life is the creation of our mind.” – Buddha
Maybe, Now Is A Good Time To Change What You Are Doing!
Life is very diverse, with so much to offer us. The range of stuff for us to experience is so much more now than at any other time in history. We are privileged to be living in this unprecedented time of choice and abundance….. and you can’t find anything to be happy about?????
I suggest you look closely at your situation and either learn to embrace what’s in front of you….. OR change your situation so that you begin having more experiences that are satisfying for you.
After all, there is nothing more important for our health and wellbeing than the way we are feeling….. So, find things that make you feel good, and do them…. And then find something else that makes you feel good, and do it….. and then repeat, over and over again.
…. And in this way, your sucky life will become a journey of fun, satisfaction, and joy. This is the way to live…..
So, I’d advise you to never remain in a situation that sucks and wish things were different….. It’s up to you, and only you, to create a better life experience for yourself. So, embrace what’s in front of you…. Or change it!