It’s not surprising that many people are wanting to know “How to feel better” considering the current state of the world. There is so much stress, confusion, isolation, and fear, happening in all countries, across all races, religions, and socio-economic groups. It seems no one is immune to the hardships brought about by the pandemic and the draconian measures put in place to try and control it.
However, even before these unprecedented times, there was always a certain amount of ‘suffering’ associated with just living life. We don’t feel good for many reasons, and at these times we often ask ourselves “why isn’t my life working out for me?” It’s almost as if we know we are entitled to feel better than the way we do.
When we don’t know what we want, we are unhappy. When we don’t get what we want, we are unhappy. And when we get something other than what we want, we are unhappy. It seems that the only way to feel better is to know what we want and then get it. However, there is a much bigger picture to feeling better than just getting what we want. So, let’s explore this!
Want To Learn How To Feel Better?
Feeling better IN THE NOW moment is easy. It’s usually just a matter of choosing a favorite method of temporarily distracting our bodies, minds, and emotions so we are not ‘involved in the things, actions, and thoughts, that are holding us in a place of discomfort or unease. However, overall wellbeing requires that we undergo a larger transformation to become more content and a happier HUMAN BEING.
First, why is it that we are not feeling better?
We need to understand why we are not feeling better so we can work out the best solution. We are all different and we all go through different ups and downs. This is just a natural part of being alive…. No one is ever happy and content all of the time. And even though some of your friends seem to live a fantastic life on Facebook, the reality is almost certainly much different.
Different can people also bounce back quicker than others. And this depends on several factors. The main factor is the number of ‘tools’ we have at our disposal to counter the down-times. By tools, I mean, the tips, tricks, and knowledge we have learned and can apply to help us recover.
I think it’s fair to separate those who are temporarily unhappy or down from others who are chronically unhappy and depressed as a way of life. And the solutions to each are necessarily different.
If we are generally happy, optimistic, and satisfied with life, a little ‘down-time’ will be easily fixed. We can use one or many different methods that distract our senses from the issues that are bringing us down.
However, if we are FREQUENTLY feeling down, depressed, stressed, or anxious, it’s because it’s become our habit. This means it’s wired into our neurology and has become our general ‘state of being.’ We have, unfortunately, progressively developed this state over time because of ‘the way we view the world.’
By ‘state of being,’ I mean it’s who we have become because of the way we have learned to think and feel about ourselves, our circumstances, and the events that we experience happening within the world.
We are emotional beings, and we learn by being exposed to a variety of experiences, not a singular experience.
We are emotional, mental, and physical beings and all of these aspects are important to acknowledge and experience. The ability to think and feel is what makes us human. However, while it’s important to recognize and experience negative emotions when they arise, continually focusing on and revisiting the cause of the negativity is not at all beneficial for us. You can explore this further in my post: What is EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE?
If we were an animal and a competitor came and stole our mate, what’s next? We would continue as best we could for as long as we can…… animals are compelled by nature to continue to follow the program that is particular to their species.
However, we are human, and we are gifted with the ability to think and reason. This opens us up to being able to make choices. So, if someone steals our mate, we have a range of options to choose from. They range from violence, depression, sadness, hate, anger, all the way through to relief and appreciation (because if our partner wanted to go, maybe our relationship wasn’t really that good!)
Let’s assume we are feeling down in the dumps, lonely, sad, or depressed, for any number of other reasons. What can we do to feel better?
What can we do if we don’t know why we are feeling down?
If you are normally optimistic but are now feeling down, first, take a moment to check in with yourself.
Get comfortable somewhere you won’t be disturbed for a while, and take a few slow, deep breaths.
Don’t force it, just allow your breath to find its own rhythm. This may take a minute or more, depending on your experience.
Next, become aware of how your body is feeling. Notice any movement, tingling, sensations, without judgment. Allow your mind to wander from one sensation to the next, without the need to analyze or understand anything. Spend as long as you want here. This can be a very satisfying process.
Then, begin to notice your thoughts. Just sit back and ‘watch’ them traverse the endless space of your mind.
Allow them to flow at their own pace without holding onto them, without judgment. Stay with this until you are very comfortable.
Then, ask yourself “How am I feeling now?” Don’t think of an answer, or try and force anything. Instead, just ‘allow’ the answer to be revealed to you in its own time. Feel it! Just sit with it for a while, and experience it.
Your feelings are an experience that you are having and you should not deny or suppress them. If you do, they will come back again and again, until you have experienced them and either learned from them or resolved them.
It’s more important to experience the emotion (vibration) and ‘complete it’ (if it is negative) than to mentally analyze and understand it. While here in a relaxed state, you may get an insight into why you are feeling this way. This may be enough for you to understanding how to move on to begin to feel better.
Is it a problem if we are still unsure of why we are feeling down?
If you received an answer from the process above, great, now you will know how to move on past these temporary ill feelings.
If you didn’t receive an answer, don’t worry because mental answers are not always appropriate for emotional issues. Maybe you don’t have a reason, or maybe the answer is not important. What is important here is the feeling!
Because we live in a vibrational universe, we should always care about how we are feeling.
It is our feelings that vibrate signals out into the universal mind and attract matching conditions back into our lives. This means that if we stay fixated on any specific feelings, we build up momentum that will attract more of the same feelings back to us as circumstances, events, and people, into our lives.
Your current feelings are made up of what you have been thinking and doing before feeling this way. This is why we need to become aware of how we are feeling at all times. Even now. How are you feeling at this moment? Would you be happy to receive ‘MORE’ of the same feelings over and over again? Then continue to think and do similar things that led to the creation of this feeling/emotion and because of The Law of Attraction, you will receive more of the same.
If you are not happy with your current feeling, you need to change something NOW!
For a quick pick me up, there are many things we can do, and I’m sure you already apply some of them to your lives. They require that we remove our attention from the thoughts we are currently thinking that are bring us down. Our attention can then be focused somewhere else that we know will stimulate better thoughts which will make us feel better. They may include things like:
- Open your windows, get outside and walk on the grass, smell the breeze, and feel the sun on your bare skin. No sun? Why not dance in the rain! And all the while, breathe deeply, for these things are the foundation of all our lives.
- Take time to play with your kids or with animals. Look at life through their eyes and their innocence. Notice how they ‘live in the moment’ and be inspired and refreshed.
- Put on your favorite music and sing loudly and explore new movement….. move in ways you don’t usually move, and laugh loudly at yourself, just for the fun of it. This will stimulate the release of ‘happy’ chemicals in your brain making you feel good.
- Get plenty of direct sun on your skin. The production of vitamin D and serotonin depends on it. A minimum of 20 minutes a day is required to ward off depression. Without the sun, we cannot live. Be grateful that the sun freely gives us its life-giving energy.
- Just take a break and connect with friends or watch something inspirational. Talk to someone who makes you laugh, or laugh at the TV. Why? Because either action will make you feel better! And feeling better IS BETTER than moping around feeling sorry for yourself.
- Go and do something nice for someone else! The smile on their face, love, and appreciation in their hearts will be enough to cheer you up. Gratitude and appreciation are contagious!
- Get out of your routine and go and do something new. Get a massage, go to a golf driving range, or just go to a new café and make a conversation with someone new. Who knows what fun you can have!
- Get a hug…… smile and fake it until you make it if you have to. Smiling in public attracts interesting reactions and interactions from others…..Don’t believe me, why not give it a go!
As a bonus, Patia Braithwaite, in her article “Ways to feel better right now” offers two more ideas that I agree with. They are:
- Watch a cute animal live its unbothered life.
- Have sex with yourself or someone else.
The above ideas are temporary fixes for people who already feel good most of the time. However, if you need to feel better a lot of the time, more permanent solutions are required.
Our condition, or state of being, is something that we have developed over some time. If we are often depressed, grumpy, sad, etc. these conditions have become part of our personality.
For a fix that will allow us to change our predominant state of being to become a genuinely more happy and loving person, it’s going to take time. It was a ‘progression’ that got us here, not a single incident that has caused us to be this way. This means we will have to change some of our ingrained beliefs and habits also in a progressive way.
Here are some ways of undoing our self-destructive ideas so that we can begin to feel better and eventually lead happier, more abundant lives:
- Accept responsibility for your current circumstances and don’t blame others for the way you feel. Our feelings are a result of OUR thinking and acting. No one else has the job of fixing us, because they are all too busy with their own issues.
- Face your fears by stepping out of your comfort zone. Expansion and new experiences give us courage and more confidence. Here, we will learn that we are in control of our bodies, minds, and emotions.
- Focus on what you can control and do what you enjoy more often. Know that it is ok for you to have a good time and to feel good! In fact, it is the only responsible course of action.
- Learn to appreciate yourself, body, mind, and soul. You are a divine being- and don’t ever forget it! Fall in love with yourself for all that you have done can do, and hope to do…. Motivate yourself to do more and more, just for the hell of it, just for the fun of it, and just for the experience of it!
- Release all judgments against yourself and others as well as events and circumstances in your life. Life just is: it’s neither good nor bad, BUT how we think about it makes it so! Our perception of life is only that…. A perception we have based on how we think and believe. Change your beliefs and you will change your world!
- Stop watching Main-stream-media and consuming so much garbage on social media. Its continual bad news is poison for our body, mind, and soul!
- Learn and practice mindfulness and/or meditation for your mind. Yoga, Tai Chi, and Chi Gong, and martial arts are great for the body and emotions. All are good for our energy (VIBRATION).
- Avoid things and situations that provide only short-term gratification but are harmful in the long term. This includes ‘rubbish’ foods high in sugars and other nasty stuff, overindulging with alcohol, chocolates, ice-cream, TV, shopping, etc. They will harm you and your self-perception in the long term. They only give temporary relief and long-term destruction of your body and mental and emotional energy.
- Sleeping well is important for optimum health. If you are not sleeping well, try and find out why, and do your best to get a good night’s sleep, every night. It’s important to go to sleep in a positive frame of mind. Then waking up will be a pleasant experience and set you up for a great start to the new day!
- Most of us already have things that we really enjoy doing. Go and do it, and spend more time doing it. Passion promotes joy, and joy promotes overall mental, physical, and emotional wellbeing.
- Make a list of all that you are grateful for. If nothing else, be grateful that the sun comes up every day, and that we all have air to breathe to sustain our lives. The way we view life determines how we feel. CHOOSE TO VIEW LIFE FROM A POSITIVE PERSPECTIVE, AND YOUR LIFE WILL IMMEDIATELY IMPROVE.
Feeling better requires that we take control of our state of mind. This can be very challenging, however, it is very possible for those who are determined to live happy and successful lives. You can do it!
Maybe we didn’t choose all of the stuff that is currently happening around the world and affecting all of us in many different ways. Currently, people are dying, getting sick, losing jobs, being locked in their homes, going broke, etc. None of us would have wanted this, but it is happening.
Our challenge to remain happy and abundant requires that we focus on what we are still in control of. And that is our minds. The way we respond to circumstances and events is always a choice.
Our choices determine who we will become at the end of it. Do we have it within us to be kind, compassionate, considerate, sharing, and supportive? Or will we allow our beautiful world to descend into chaos fuelled by fear?
Whatever choice we make, we need to know that we will come through these rough times, and we will be sharing the world with others. I wish to be sharing my space with those that offered help and support when needed, those that recognize that we are all in this together, those who are willing to rebuild communities based on equality and cooperation.
Are you willing to heal yourselves to become part of a ‘better feeling’ new world?
And last but not least: Why not do what I do to feel better?
I write this page and many others like it on my website. I do this as a passion in the hopes that I can inspire others to take control of their lives, and learn to live in ways that bring them much abundance, joy, love, and satisfaction.
Is there something you are passionate about, something you are knowledgeable about, or something you wish to learn more about? Then why not begin your own website and share what you learn and know with others. It’s much easier than you may think with the many free tools available with Wealthy Affiliate.
Check out the free starter membership here….
Shared with love and respect for all souls who choose to play the game of life,