We have all been around people that bring us down, and unfortunately, some of them do it on purpose. They just seem to have a knack for finding the negative in every situation, as well as in all other people, including us! However, it’s really important for our well-being that you don’t let people bring you down.
It’s very challenging to be around them, and especially draining and tiring if we cannot remove ourselves from the situation. It’s like they are energy vampires and are intent on sucking the very life out of us. Unfortunately, they may be close relatives, work colleagues, or someone we share accommodation with. Or…… they may even be us!
If we are the source of our own negativity, the one who is constantly dumping down on ourselves, then we need to stop it immediately……. because it only ever leads to unhappiness and ill-health. If this is you, YOU CAN LEARN some useful solutions that will help you out of this bad habit by reading my previous posts, including NOTHING IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN THE WAY WE FEEL, HOW CAN I MAKE MY LIFE BETTER, and WHY DO I HAVE NEGATIVE THOUGHTS. In these posts, you will learn that life is not about accepting circumstances as they are, or about ‘finding ourselves,’ but that life is all about creating ourselves to become all that we want to be!
So that’s about us….. What about when we are being dumped upon by others?
“Negativity may knock at your door, but that doesn’t mean you have to let it in.” – Anonymous
Life presents us with many choices every day. And accepting negativity from others is a choice we make…. I know many people believe that they are powerless to change the situation, and this is in itself a choice that they have inadvertently made. And by continuing to allow negative situations that are harming us, mentally, emotionally, or physically, we are effectively walking into future lives that will be worse than our current lives…..
Think about that!…… Your life is not going to get any better if you are surrounding yourself with negative people, events, and situations. Why would anyone choose this and then continue to accept this?
Our choice: hang out with those who bring us down….. OR remove ourselves from their influence so that we can look forward to a better future. After all, life is too short to hang out with destructive people.
To enable us to make the choice of removing ourselves from negative influences, it assists us if we first understand WHY are other people wanting to bring us down?
“Remember…Whoever is trying to bring you down is already below you.” – Ziad K. Abdelnour
Ok, so what does this quote mean?….. People who continually make adverse judgments about others ARE NOT HAPPY, HEALTHY, AND CERTAINLY NOT WISE PEOPLE! THEY have ISSUES that they are NOT dealing with, and they are taking their frustrations out on anyone who will listen.
What they are trying to project on us is actually a direct reflection of THEIR subconscious programming. Their words and actions ARE revealing to us how crappy their lives are, and how badly they are feeling on the inside, mentally, emotionally, and physically, about their own lives….. and as such, THEIR OPINIONS HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH US!
So consider this: It doesn’t really matter what a sad, unhappy, unhealthy person thinks of us, because all they are able to think about and share are sad, unhappy, and unhealthy thoughts….. NONE OF US NEED THESE PEOPLE IN OUR LIVES…. So, we should remove ourselves from their influence altogether, or as far and as often from it as possible.
Negative people always have one thing in common, and that is they think the ‘problem’ they are complaining about is never their doing…. They think that everything bad that happens is always someone else’s fault and in this way, they never accept any responsibility for anything that is not working out for them in their lives. And they think that they are doing us a favor by pointing out that we are the ones that need to change….. THEY WANT US TO CHANGE SO THAT THEY WILL FEEL BETTER! (This doesn’t sound like a very good idea to me.)
They think they feel superior because ‘they are right, and we are wrong,’ and this makes them feel like they have won something over us. This is just a behavioral habit (a program) that they have learned from others that were responsible for their early life programming…. they were taught that bullying is the way to feel superior to others. (Hopefully, we were lucky enough to learn differently.)
Bullying, negativity, and low self-esteem are all traits of severely injured personalities and unfortunately, these people can’t yet understand that no one wins by pulling others down. So, we should never let other people’s opinions influence the way we feel…. Unless they are positive opinions, and we can use them to build ourselves up. Hanging out with positive people is of enormous benefit as happy, healthy, confident, and successful people do not go around with the intention of bringing others down, but will always be an inspiration to us!
“People who project negativity typically have low self-esteem. They feel bad about themselves, and their negativity is simply a reflection of those feelings.” – Hendrie Weisinger
Think about this: No matter what we do in life, there are always going to be some people who disapprove, or disagree. This is just a fact of life because we are all diverse beings with different thoughts, ideas, values, and beliefs….. this simply means that WE ARE NEVER, EVER, GOING TO BE ABLE TO PLEASE EVERYONE!
This is important to understand, and when you get it, your life will forever change, for the better….. simply because when you stop trying to please other people and put your focus where it should be, YOU WILL BEGIN TO START LOOKING AFTER YOURSELF BETTER! And when you care about how you feel you will begin doing things and hanging out with people that MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER…… YOUR LIFE STARTS GETTING BETTER FROM THE MOMENT YOU PUT YOUR HAPPINESS FIRST!
If you put your happiness and wellbeing at the top of your priority list, then when you are nearing the end of this journey you will not be disappointed with the life experience you have lived…… and this is the most important thing about life, here in this reality…. To have a fun-filled, joyful experience…… after all, none of us want to approach the end of our lives and be thinking ‘It could have been better if only I had…..’
“You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control your attitude toward what happens to you, and in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you.” – Brian Tracy
Most of us are living life on ‘autopilot’ or in a ‘reactionary mode.’ This is where we see, hear, feel, taste, and touch stuff happening in our environment, and we react to it based on information stored in our subconscious minds. So in effect, we are the victims of our deep-seated beliefs or the mind programs that are running below the level of conscious thought.
When in this mode, we are not able to make the best decisions based on current information, but instead, react based on information from our past habits, which may or may not be beneficial. I say not beneficial, because although it seems that many situations present themselves over and over again, they are never completely the same. Everything is constantly changing… this is just the nature of life, and so we can also change the way we respond,….. but only if we use our conscious minds.
It’s important to understand that if we keep allowing other people to dump on us, that sooner or later we will begin to believe them, begin to believe that we are in some way ‘not good enough’ and this WILL affect the quality of our lives….. especially if the person bringing us down is someone we cannot escape from, someone we love or someone we care about.
Brian Tracy’s quote above gives us an insight into taking control of our lives in a way that will benefit our future…. “We can control our attitude towards what happens to us.” When negative people show up in our lives, what can we do? It’s best to get out of there as soon as we can. However, if this is not possible, we must protect ourselves mentally, emotionally, and energetically as best as we can. So:
- Don’t buy into ‘their problems’ by allowing them to bring you down to their level. Know that you are not part of ‘their problem,’ no matter what they may say or believe.
- Don’t engage on their level, rather just accept them as they are without taking their negativity on board.
- Don’t waste energy trying to change their minds. If they are habitually negative, they are not going to suddenly change their minds because of something you say.
- If they continue to download negativity to you, don’t give them the response they want, don’t become afraid, sad, remorseful, sorry, or hurt. Rather, be confident knowing that they are the ones with the problem here, not you. Try to change the subject, and move on.
- Remain mindful of the present moment instead of becoming angry with the past or fearful of the future in relation to what they are complaining about.
REMEMBER: NO ONE HAS ANY POWER TO HURT US unless we let them get inside our heads, and UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES IS IT BENEFICIAL FOR US to allow negative people to have any influence over the quality and the content of our lives!
“If a person finds negative people in his life, then he needs to mend his own nature than that of others, for his own basic grounding decides the level of acidic or toxicity surrounding him.” – Anuj Somany
In this quote, Anuj Somany is talking directly about The Law of Attraction. He is saying that negative people are only in our lives because they are a direct match to OUR OWN NATURE. And when we understand this, we have the remedy to our problems….. In the vibrational universe that we exist in, like attracts like, and it can be no other way.
This is why it is we who must first change ourselves, so that we will begin attracting positive and supportive people, and therefore better circumstances into our lives.
“Your present circumstances don’t determine where you can go; they merely determine where you start.” – Nido Qubein
We can ALL get to live the better lives we desire for ourselves from where we are now. It just means making better decisions, starting now. Decisions that will revolve around raising our vibrations…. And a very important aspect of this is to remove negativity from our lives.
This means stop hanging out with people that bring you down, stop engaging in habits that don’t support your overall wellbeing, and stop going to places and events that don’t contribute to your desires for an improved future.
Life is far too short to waste your time doing things and hanging out with those that don’t bring out the best in you. You are not here to fix other people, point out all that is wrong with the world, or to be unhappy. Let other people get on with their own lives because they are going to anyway, and take better care of yourself.
Know that you are here for your own experience and that you don’t have anything to prove to anyone. So get on with living your life in the best possible way you can, because after all, it’s your choice what you do with each day you are given. So make each one count as only you can!
Be grateful for all the experiences you have had up until now, as they have made you this person you are now…. The person who is here now reading this AND IS READY TO LEAVE THE PAST BEHIND AND MOVE ON TO A BETTER, BRIGHTER, AND HAPPIER FUTURE!
“Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.” – Prov 4:23 (NLT)
Shared with love and respect for all souls who choose to play the game of life.